Looking for More -Janelle Alex
“I know there is more. There has to be more than what I am doing. I just can’t put my finger on it.” I thought those thoughts for years and years. I owned my own business and I truly loved my job, but it still didn’t fulfill me. I was constantly searching for something else. I finally vocalized my inner exasperation to others simply stating what I had felt for so long, “I am supposed to be doing more. This isn’t it.” I searched in many different places to no avail. Many times over I was told by different people things like, “Why don’t you just do what you are good at?” or “Get a real job and make a good living,” or “You will never be able to make any money doing that.” I was battered by those around me. I believe they thought they were helping or perhaps, they simply spoke with no mind to what they were saying, but their words caused me to falter for many years. I did not push too much to truly find what I was missing. In fact, it took me over twenty years to finally say, “No more. I have to go after what I need. I can only give back if I find me.”
Now, I didn’t leave my family or shirk my responsibilities, but I found a way to rediscover my authentic self and allow that “me” to be seen by the world. Do you feel that you are missing something? Are you looking for more than your religion offers? Or, does religion cause you to withdraw? Is your life a rat race? Do you feel the tug – the need for more?
Religion often carries strict rules. The interpretation of what scriptures and ancient texts say range from one end of the spectrum to the other. No one can say absolutely what was meant by the writings. Take an email today – if you write the words, “I love you,” are you saying you are deeply in love with someone, you love him/her in a maternal way, you love the work he does, you love her as a friend, you love him as a brother, you love her humor, and so on. These three little words do not always mean the same thing.
Your hectic daily life consumes so much of your time you have no time for yourself. You cannot find an opportunity to center yourself and connect with the true you. You rush to work in the morning. You rush to take little Susie to the dentist and back to school. You rush to pick up the kids. You rush over to your mother’s house to make sure she took her medication correctly and ate today. You rush by the grocery story to grab a quick meal from the deli. You rush to get the kids’ homework done and get them to bed. You sit down exhausted to finish work you brought home or maybe you are working on your college degree and have homework. You hurry to brush your teeth before you fall asleep standing at the sink. You collapse into bed. Alarm goes off - time to start it all again. This may not be your life, but I am sure you could plug in your own rush here and rush there.
You know there is more to life than this. You know you need more. You need a place to center, to calm, to reflect, to expand and to connect with your spirit. You may experience high blood pressure, tense shoulders, stomach problems, relationship problems or a whole host of other emotional or physical issues. Finding your inward oasis can help you recover your true self and heal your mind, body and spirit. There are times you will suffer through pain and discomfort, but being able to access a sense of serenity and inner joy will help you get through anything they throw at you.
Watch for next month’s article which will be an overview of ways to center yourself, rejuvenate your spirit, and find the more that is inside of you.
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